These are not normal squirrels!!!

Greetings avid NHOP followers.

One of my most recent discoveries is how unique the Canadian squirrel  is!!

In the UK we have very few squirrels in the city -I have never seen any in Glasgow and only a few in Edinburgh and I guess all the pigeons ate the squirrels in London!! But Ottawa seems to be the perfect breeding place for the common squirrel!

I say common but the squirrels around NHOP seem to be some special genetically modified squirrel!!

Now Rob Parker our Mighty director has had many Grey_squirrel_drey_e_fe01c58afa0f8755446a42b3a7a9445fencounters with the wee beasts!! He has often threatened to kill them with his gun!! But it is the city and we don’t want to get in any trouble now do we, Rob?

182998YEGD_wI understand his frustration, they eat holes in our garbage bin and climb into our roof playing with all the cables up there! They smoke and look at you with anger in there eyes! I think they drink a bit too!!

 

Now Rob and Richard have started trapping them and88639304_53c7203996 releasing them across the river! I have this theory that it’s the same squirrel that keeps coming back, like it is some kind of adrenalin junky! I have even suggested we paint it’s tail red so we know if it’s the same one or not!!

 

<Digimax V700 / Kenox V10 / Digimax V10 >The squirrels have been advancing in their battle to overthrow NHOP – I believe  they would like a National House for Squirrels!! Most recently they have this one squirrel who is a body builder. We believe his job is to deal with our guard dog Oakley as he has been spotted spying on him in the past!!

 

 <Digimax V700 / Kenox V10 / Digimax V10 >They have been doing a lot of spying on us in Squirrel Camera the past few months, we even had one sneak into a staff meeting and take pictures of some of our TOP SECRET NHOP documents!! But that’s not all. As you know we have a wireless Internet connection that has a crazy password for it, but their IT squirrel managed to hack our system, causing us problems with our email!! OK What can we DO?

 

Once they have all the information they need we are finding that they are starting to advance in their battle to overtake NHOP! Recent photographs have shown that they have more weapons of mass destruction than we first feared!!

 

<Digimax V700 / Kenox V10 / Digimax V10 >

 

<Digimax V700 / Kenox V10 / Digimax V10 >jedi_squirrel

 

As you can see we have a real problem!! 

 

Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!! Send them to iain@nhop.ca  I’ll be sure to pass them onto Rob.

Thanks for reading the ramblings of a Scotsman at NHOP!!

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3 Responses to These are not normal squirrels!!!

  1. jaarge says:

    The squirrels have been smoking? only the squirrels?
    🙂

  2. jubalmusic says:

    Perhaps these apparently demonized rodents are feeding on a very large supply of “acorny” … ;o)
    … an idea might be to fight them with a specialized group of Trappists … that is, those sequestered clerics that are shouldering bitter root issues which have not been properly dealt with … er … what are they called again? Chip-monks?

    Blessings from North Bay …

    Chris Hermann
    (pun-foo master)

  3. yvonneparks says:

    A) Look who has a new version of Photoshop!!

    and

    B) Look who has waaaay too much time on his hands!!

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